Got some actual airtime on CTV.

The protests were held on Feb 10 as it is the birthday of Lisa McPherson, a Scientologist who had a mental breakdown, was taken to a Scientology Center to be put on an Introspection Rundown for those who have had psychotic breaks, and wasn’t seen again until they brought her dead to the hospital, underweight, dehydrated, and covered in cockroach bites. Hence the “Happy Birthday Lisa” sentiments here and at the end of this.

The protests were being done by “Anonymous”, who is made of…cupcakes?

Paris

Some Parisian protesters seem to be confused: they put on masks and
wander around playing pirate songs, no actual mention of Scientology. Others dress up as a clown in front of the Church and call out Xenu.

London

Wins for its real live Rickroll. Unable to withstand this horrendous onslaught, the Scientologists run screaming from the building after the camera stops rolling

Melbourne

A Scientologist in Melbourne gets up on top of the building to take photos of people (I don’t know why, it’s just something they do. I think it’s to be intimidating) In response, the protesters chant for him to “jump”.

Montreal

Small, but brings the lolz. And an “over 9 thousaaaand” reference.

Boulder

Gets the crazies. Actual quote: “I knew Xenu back when he was Jesus Christ and Hitler”

Chicago

Has a bylaw prohibiting protesting churches during services. The Scientologists tell the police they are holding services all day long.

Nashville

Waaaay classier than the rest of the world. They show up in suits and veils with neatly printed signs (compare Montreal).

Atlanta

Atlanta might win for getting the riot police out (2, 3).

New York

Masks, you’re doing it wrong (2, 3).

Detroit

I have no fucking clue what’s going on here, I think the cold got to them.

Seattle

Cannot find the Scientologists But they make up for it with a Rickroll.

Rochester

Finding the Scientologists is a bit harder in Rochester, as they replaced all their signage with “Success School of Driving”